As an outsider looking in on others’ relationships we sometimes think, “Now there’s an unhealthy relationship!”  Maybe, to you, it’s passive-aggressive; maybe it’s codependent; maybe one of the mates is abusive… whatever whoever defines as “unhealthy”.

Driving to work each day consciously aware of the traffic yet subconsciously mind-drifting to who knows where, I have … ‘driving thoughts’.  The “driving thought” du jour the other day was pondering the “healthy relationship” supposition.  Somehow, in that thought, the concept of magnetic polarity came to mind.  (I don’t really know where these thoughts come from or how these connections get made.  I like to believe they’re channeled from my higher sub-consciousness from another dimension.  Those who hear these thoughts do admit that they ARE fascinating and make for fun and lively discussions… but I digress!!)

Remember when you were a kid? You’d play with magnets and try to force magnets of the same polarity to ‘click’?  Try as you might, it wasn’t going to happen.  At some point, you even thought it would and you enjoyed the challenge and the determination it took to make them connect.  However, the more you tried to make them stick together, the more the forces would repel.  The more they repelled each other, the more determined you became to force them together the way you wanted them to be together – not the way that worked for them.  Then you figured out that all you had to do was move one of them in another direction – and wham, they’d stick like glue.  (Well, actually they’d stick like magnets!!).

It struck me that relationships can be likened to the magnetic polarity theory.  And those that we call “unhealthy” could be compared to the repelling magnets… unless or until one moves in a more polaritically (a ‘shari-word’) correct direction. Now, if we attempt to transmute this concept from merely physics to metaphysics, and roll in the idea that like attracts like, and/or opposites attract – what do we get?  

First we’ll consider the concept of ‘like attracts like’.  In that framework, who is anyone to say that repelling magnets are unhealthy?  For whom?  And are they really “repelling” or are they merely exchanging or transferring energy fields?  What if that is the exact perfect energy conduction for the situation at the time?  Society would have us believe that in that energy field (the type of relationships listed above) that neither entity can be happy or fulfilled.  Yet, if it is true that we attract what we need and that we are all on varying spiritual paths based on varying karmic circumstances; that we may be at varying echelons on our journeys – then we would conclude that each component of the relationship is exactly where it needs to be, getting exactly what it needs at that point in time.  From a metaphysical perspective, all is perfectly balanced and healthy and the universe prevails and provides!!  This is not to say that there are no unhealthy relationships, it’s mainly to point out that people stay in these relationships because they’re getting ‘something’ they need at the time from that relationship and it is part of their karmic ‘play-out’ – their ‘synchronicity’ – subconsciously sought in order to move further along their spiritual path.

If we are one of the repelling magnets, at what point do we realize that we are and/or change our direction to enmesh the energy fields instead of forcing them?  Sadly, some never do.  Interestingly and oftentimes to a point of non-comprehension, sometimes these relationships continue to function well if that’s what they were meant to be... if the parties are playing out their karmic lives transmitting “messages” that each other needs to do so.  For others, hopefully it’s realized early on where either or both begin to use the tools available to metaphysically enhance the physics relationship to create an energy field that allows for and creates peace within themselves and relationships at large.  This can mean that each magnet has to go find other magnets to play with.  And the cycle begins again.  Sometimes the pair of magnets work together to create a more polaritically correct energy field… and that’s a good thing!!!

The concept of ‘opposites attract’...  In the context of magnetic polarity – where the magnets will now stick together – this is a much more socially acceptable and “healthy” scenario.  If either or both components move individually or congruently within the energy field where the need to repel does not exist – the ‘opposites attract’ theory has been created and energy fields becomes enmeshed.  A more comfortable situation for each entity and the need to repel is not there. The conjoined ‘forces’ mesh with ease.  Presumably both entities in this relationship are balanced allowing for the continuance of this connection on all levels – emotional, spiritual, and physical (or what I call ESP!!). Metaphysically speaking it all ends up the same … all “magnets” are exactly where they need to be, getting exactly what they need to be fulfilled, and all is perfectly balanced and healthy… and the universe, once again, prevails and provides!!